What has wings, is bald, and can't fly? A bald eagle. I lied about the part where it can't fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Juan

thumb_up thumb_down +30

what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

ROSS G IS OBESE

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Whats 9 + 10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

thumb_up thumb_down +28

And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

thumb_up thumb_down +28

gay rights

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

42.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops