Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +23

An asian walks out of math class

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the elephant fall into the hot chocolate? It fell off the marshmellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops