You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

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Go away.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

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What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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“Anything that moves ey?” – William Deane

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

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A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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