Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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penis

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Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

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What's funnier then an anti-joke? People who fail at making them.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

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A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

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knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

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i hate you.

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What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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What comes after "Q" R

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Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

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a banana

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

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Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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What rhymes with turtle? Rape

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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