Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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