What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

Read a Book.

do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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