How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops