Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Wtf?

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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