That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

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Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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