My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

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What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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