How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Up until today I thought eminem was the lead singer for maroon 5

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What do you call a gay jewish guy? Heblew.

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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How do you get a one-armed kid down from a tree? Wave.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a fish? A dead fish.

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whatis worse then tripping over and landing head first in dog shit No alot

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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What do you call a black person living in the US? An African American.

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

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Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

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What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

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what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

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This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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