What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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What do you call a 2 storied house ?

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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