This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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