Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

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What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

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How long does it take a blonde to skrew in a light bulb? Any amount of time; given that she knows that said bulb is in need of replace meant, or that said blonde is disabled, or if you thought I would make some kind of funny blonde joke that you would tell your friend and then forget ten minutes later, only to think of it a day later and claim it as your own.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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TRICERATOPS!

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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