What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops