What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

thumb_up thumb_down -45

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops