Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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A miserable man committed suicide.

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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A storm be brewin!

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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