Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

i dont fisish anythi

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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