Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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i saw amango it splootered

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops