An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

A blonde is rowing a boat in a cornfield. While driving by, another blonde notices and pulls over and steps out of her car. She looks out and yells "You know, it's blondes like you that are giving us a bad name. If you weren't so far out, I would swim out there and beat the shit outta you!"

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

How many light bulbs? 1

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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