Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

You're a big fat monkey.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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