A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

whats white and sticky? a white stick

Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

antonio has a penis head.lol

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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