why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops