Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

thumb_up thumb_down +24

a. why? b. because I wanted

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops