Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Violets are blue Deez nuts Ha goteem

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

thumb_up thumb_down -13

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops