An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

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Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

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Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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