The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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