yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

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Q: What happens when two feminists try to chanbe a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

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A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops