What's brown an sticky Shit

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Cripples are lame.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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