my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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so today i took a poop. hehe

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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i dont care if you rate me or not

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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Turkey Balls

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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