What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

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Nickelback

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

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Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

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Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you smoke, the blacker your lungs get.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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I'm not wearing underwear. Why? Because I have built in underwear. :)

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What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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