How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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