What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

What did the teacher do? He taught.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A watch and a pair of socks.

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

Q~ What did the black man say to the priate when he pulled out a AK47? A~ "This is a gun. im going to kill you with it."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

asians have slitted eyes lol

Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

what did spiderman say before he saved mary jane? ill save you mary jane.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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