What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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