So this guy was making a sandwich...

why did the couple sell their house? their children were all raped and then murdered in it and they cant stand the memories

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

Jesus Christ

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

A zebra and a giraffe are out in a safari and they see some humans. And then the cow, was drinking, the man was milking the drink, when the giraffe was going to buy some milk. She said, the was yeah okay.

Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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