how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

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9/11 my birthday

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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