Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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