Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

Weaner

What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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