What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What's the safest way to tell a racist joke? Ask everybody who might hear the joke if they would be offended by a racist joke.

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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