What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

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what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

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PENIS lol

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homosexual rights to marriage

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

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So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. Imams do not drink alcohol so this joke has a logical flaw.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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