Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

What is a 3 legged dog? It's still a dog! Sheesh

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Why is Lewis hayphore gay Answer = because he sucked hos brother off #Cameron Hayphore

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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