Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

A baby seal walks into a club.

A house comes around the corner.

it

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

[Set up] [No punch line]

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

25

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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