Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

outside your comfort zone

salad days!

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

What happened to the boy who wnt through puberty? He bacame a man. There is nothing funny about a perfectly normal expirience that everyone goes through wether they like it or not.

"My CiOCK is bigger!" "No! My CiOCK is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger DiICK.

miha kako si?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

What's Black, White, and Red all over? A Cow in a giant blender...

Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...