what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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