What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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