why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

thumb_up thumb_down

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down

The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

thumb_up thumb_down

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down

Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

thumb_up thumb_down

What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

thumb_up thumb_down

why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

thumb_up thumb_down

If life gives you lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops