Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Knock knock. Its open.

Poker face

What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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