A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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