Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops