Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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