Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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