Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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