why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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A guy at a baseball game....

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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