I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

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a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. the bartender says thats cool where did you get it ....... the parrot says africa

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

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penis. nuff said.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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