A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

thumb_up thumb_down

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

thumb_up thumb_down

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

thumb_up thumb_down

Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

thumb_up thumb_down

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

thumb_up thumb_down

Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

thumb_up thumb_down

here's a joke... the american education society

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

thumb_up thumb_down

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops