What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

A girl talks to here boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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