Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

What did the Iraqi Suicide bomber bring on the airplane? His Kindle, he enjoys reading books

Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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